He's comign home soon...And I feel like I dont want him near me. Like I feel happy that he is coming back home to see his family and thats great!..However, I'm not sure if I am ready to see him. Does he even deserve my love anymore?
I showed my love and he hurted me so bad..SO BAD that I dont even trust him. I dont think about him as much anymore, and I dont even want him around me.
There is another Part of me that wants to stay...I dont know why, I just want to stay to see what happens. And thats what him and I are doing. We are now figuring out if we are "Meant" to be together.
I have my opinion about that. Why start a relationship and not know if you want to be with that person? Thats what he did to me. If you're going to tell me after almost 2 yrs of being together, that I MIGHT not be the right one? What kind of crap is that?! You should've known this in the start of our relationship, not at the point of my love is growing for you. I want to slap him, Punch him, and just leave.
I wish i wouldnt love so hard...I wish I can just be normal...(emotional wise). I guess thats just me. I will soon know..I will soon know if we are meant to be together. Through God, we will find out...I'm scared, but we have to do what we have to do...
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